Wednesday, February 18, 2009

A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women

Interesting title right?

Who wouldnt want to be a part of "A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women". Let me rephrase that which guy wouldnt want to be part of " A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women".

So when i get this update on my FB......"5 of your friends joined the group A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women", immediately I smell a rat. Click on the link but of course 4 out of the 5 are guys.

I go to the link and there are 48,118 members. There are 8 display pics out of which 6 are guys. In true ex-advertising style that sample is enough for me.

Why the hell would i want to join this? The whole fun of being surrounded by loose forward pub going women and all i find is guys...what the fuck?

Now I understand that i might be trivialising this whole issue, and many of the people who have signed up are there for moral support blah blah blah.....

Honest confession I still havent come across a cause i havent been able to trivialise, or so learned psychopathic friends of mine say (they of course have been driven to psychosis cos of my indifference and trivialisation of issues or so they say....but fuck them. Who the fuck trusts these psychos anyways).

But hear me out. I know a few of the women who have signed up, most of them are married with kids and not loose as far as i know. Most of them are teetotallers or at best "Shiraz please" variety. And they seem to be seriously outnumbered by the drunk ass guys.

This group is full of married women who are non loose teetollers and drunk guys. Am I the only person seeing this or what? Or am i the wierd one to expect a group called "A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women" to be full of pubgoing loose and forward women? This is of course the expectation with which all the guys signed up, but there must have been some Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women to start off with? Where did they go?

Or are they all having fun at a nice dark pub laughing themselves silly at all the drunk guys and nice women join a group called "A Consortium of Pub-going, Loose and Forward Women"?

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Movie Titles

"Faster Pussycat Kill Kill"

Couple of months back i stumbled upon this most delicious title for a movie ever. And of course, I was reading about Tarantino trying to remake another one of his beloved exploitation 60s trash and i mean that at a compliment.

Isnt there instant comprehension, intrigue, surprise and revulsion? What more do you want from a movie title?

For anyone interested in figuring out more about FPKK check out http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059170/

Similar ones from the exploitation, blaxploitation era "Foxy Brown", "I spit on your grave". Highly evocovative and frankly pushing the borders of decency, but cheesy and harmless enough in hindsight.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Friday the 13th - Iron Maiden Live

Of course the concert was awesome...dont need to get into details of how good they were. Am not good enough a writer to translate into words, the chemical rush inside my head when i hear the opening strains of any of the numbers. And it happened for each and every song...so....

But few things i noticed in the concert...

a. Bunch of 15-16 year olds next to me knew all the songs. Right from Iron Maiden from Iron Maiden to of course "Fear of the dark". These kids have been brought up well with the right values in life.

b. The crowd was very happy to see even Lauren Harris (Founder Steve Harris's progeny) after a couple of hours of lounging around. Enthusiastic reception even, definitely the beer talking. She got the bird every time she asked the crowd to put their hands up last time i saw her.

c. Maiden 80's and 90's output is incredibly tight, with not a note out of place. Unlike the 2000's output which tends to meander in the middle of most songs. The operatic theme driven numbers from this era tend to fall into this. But a similar themed song like "Rime of the Ancient mariner" doesnt even hint at being anything except extraordinary.

d. I love the Maiden cover of UFO's Doctor Doctor.

e. This is what i do in a maiden concert, "tan tana tan tana tan tana tantanana....tan tana tan tana tan tana tantanana...tananananana.....". Most people sing along with the lyrics, i do wierd sounds along with the guitars and drums. I dare any of you to guess the song.

f. They dint end up singing Moonchild.

g. My third maiden concert and up for many more.

IRON MAIDEN COMING TO GET YA. hey hey hey hey UP THE IRONS.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Iron Maiden

When i was young i heard this song called moonchild...and from the first bars it was obsession (like most things in my life)

Hope to hear Bruce sing "Seven Deadly Sins, Seven ways to win........."

Iron Maiden....wooohooooo....UP THE IRONS....

More on the show tomorrow...

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

The Trade Fair.....

Bill Bryson has inspired me indeed....one of the standing themes in the thunderbolt kid is the visiting state fair which comes in once a year....and much to his disgust the minimum age of entering the strip show tent is raised every year.....

Reminds me very much of the annual trade fair which used to happen on island grounds (the fair not the stripping, my god a couple of those in the island grounds...there would have been riots...damn...)in madras around pongal time (January), and would continue on until April. Used to be chaotic but man was it an occasion!

So couple of days back, I call my "former pain in the back now beloved" sister and shes like "dey (Yo) am at this fair grounds kind of place". So i go "quick try and find the panju mittai" (cotton candy), and shes like "dont think its going to be available here". I tell her that shes crazy...can she at least find the big vadam (huge rice fried papad), last attempt: look for the milaga bajji (chilli bajji). Nothing except the cotton candy was found. I was really disappointed about the big vadam though.

The reason for the frantic questioning was this, panju mittai and milaga bajji were staples which could be found on the marina beach. But this big vadam could be found only in this trade fair. It used to be this huge thingie, around the size of a bike tyre, sprinkled with chilli powder and bits of heaven.

The first thing which I used to do in this trade fair was search for the vadam guy, scout the place out (Bryson used to scout out the strippers tent, what priorities man) and guide whoever i was with in that direction. I have had various disapproving uncles tell me that it looked suspicious, whats the oil its made of etc etc. But we never did care did we.

To make sure you balanced the thingie on the newspaper in which it was wrapped, make sure it doesnt fly away in the wind, make sure you dont get sand on it, make sure the dogs dint pounce on it, make sure that other greedy kids dint finish off theirs and pounce on yours, make sure you eat fast enough so that you could pounce on the kid eating slower than you.....little vadam eating tam kids bringing in their knowledge of physics, biology, maths and part jedi/part sith skills into play .

After doing this over and over again over quite a few years the quest for the big vadam never ceased.

Wonder how the trade fair is doing these days....

Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Thunderbolt Kid and Paneer Soda

So i picked up The life and times of the Thunderbolt Kid by Bill Bryson yesterday. As always brilliantly written, unputdownable, bringing a brilliant perspective on growing up in the rampant consumeristic market that was the post WW2 USA. A constant refrain is that he might have been one of the last generation to actually see diversity, independence rather than the uniformity which is found in this day.

"Happily," Bryson writes, "we were indestructible. We didn't need seat belts, air bags, smoke detectors, bottled water, or the Heimlich maneuver. We didn't require child-safety caps on our medicines. We didn't need helmets when we rode our bikes or pads for our knees and elbows when we went skating. We knew without a written reminder that bleach was not a refreshing drink and that gasoline when exposed to a match had a tendency to combust. We didn't have to worry about what we ate because nearly all foods were good for us: sugar gave us energy, red meat made us strong, ice cream gave us healthy bones, coffee kept us alert and purring productively."

Growing up in Madras in the 1980s, I was amazed at how many of my childhood experiences closely mirror Brysons observations. Hot muggy afternoons with not much to do. Parents who really were not overprotective. Tv with very few channels. Loads of comics. Eyes being opened to books. The occasional visit out to watch a movie. and on and on.

One of the observations which really hit home was the lack of standardisation in the products and brands out there. A telling example was Nehi soda, a sort of liquid bubbling acidic concoction the way he puts it, the bubbles whizzing up your nose. And you know what i could taste it, I know exactly what he was talking about. 30 years and a lot of miles separates us but i still got what he meant.

Any kid who would have grown up in Madras(Chennai), India in the 1980s would know exactly what i was talking about. The drink was called paneer soda (not the cottage cheese from up north but literally meant soda flavoured with rose essence.Premium commodity this or so we were told). A heavy chunky green bottle (in a fight with a Coke/Pepsi bottle a paneer soda bottle would pulverize a ton of them for a midnight snack) with a kink in the throat. Also called goli soda (there can be huge arguments on whether paneer soda is indeed goli soda, but they were the same for me...so there). Goli stood for marbles the kind you played with, this was what was used to seal the bottle. Breaking it open was a delicious ritual itself. Put a finger or a thumb on the goli and hit the finger hard, wrong angle could break your finger but the right angle produced a delightful sounding "phat" a fizz and a plop (the goli settling in the kink).

And the drink itself would pretty much burn its way down your throat, find ways of escaping while doing so. All possible escape routes were explored, from up the nose, to going up to the brain, freezing it in the process, and make its way out through the ears. You would gasp for breath, make sure the goli wasnt blocking the way and do it all over again. Fairly masochistic. And there were millions of kids around me doing the same.

Was trying to remember whether i glimpsed the paneer soda bottle which would line the shelves of any potti kadai (literally a shop the size of a small box) the last time I was home. Dont really think so, was all pretty much bottles of kinley/Coke etc etc. Madras is one of those cities which doesnt give up so easy, am sure there are paneer soda bottles out there and on my next visit am going to get some!!!!

Happily enough i googled paneer soda while writing this and i believe the paneer soda is a registered trademark, how bout that?
http://www.facebook.com/s.php?ref=search&init=q&q=paneer+soda&sid=9f8146bc0ad80cf8f90473f5272a22e6#/pages/Paneer-Soda/41374158804?sid=9f8146bc0ad80cf8f90473f5272a22e6&ref=s is the link to the facebook fan page for paneer soda

There must be hundreds of similar rituals in my boyhood and am determined to put down as many as possible before i lose all my grey cells.

Coming Soon: Early morning milk runs :)

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Ponting and the Zimbabwe rag, The Herald: Delusional!!!!!

Astonishing is the word....

Haddin "got an apology via text message from Daniel". This is the latest from Australia Captain, Ricky "Punter" Ponting. The said apology is of course over the "alleged" (right) disturbing of the stumps in the first ODI between Australia and New Zealand a couple of days back. Forget the fact that no self respecting Black Cap is ever going to apologise to the Aussies, but an apology over something this big!! An incident which is rivalling the Trevor Chappell underam incident for space in NZ right now. Ponting is clearly delusional, and needs help. Forget sending Symonds for treatment, get Ponting some Brain juice.

He backs Symonds over every disaster over the last couple of years, incidents which happen faster everytime Ponting stands up for Symonds. Wake up dude, Symonds is a drunk nut case easily riled and willing to shoot his mouth off.

Remember the infamous outburst against the journalist who dared question whether Ponting had taken a catch cleanly in Sydney!!! Everytime a case is made against this man he gets into a defensive funk faster than symonds can leap towards a beer.

Forget the rest, send him to a shrink!!!!

The next masterpiece is from The Herald....after Zimbabwe defeated the mighty Kenyans (gasp, the surprise is real. how did they beat Kenya, match fixing officials please take note. i suspect kenya was bribed with 300 billion zim dollars, just enough to buy a beer in Zim, unless Andrew Symonds got there first), they have been busy showering accolades on the board. Incredible. What kind of delusional maniac claims that Chingoka has been concentrating on building Zimbabwe cricket?

But the most damning line from the editorial was this....

With the full support of all local stakeholders — and progressive bodies such as Board of Cricket Control in India — Zimbabwe will rise again.

If theres a murky puddle somewhere you can be sure that the BCCI will be nearby busy mixing more of the said murky substance in case it starts clearing up......

for the full text of this http://www.herald.co.zw/inside.aspx?sectid=1786&cat=8

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Interesting times

We live in interesting times…..

I have a lot of talented friends writing really insightful blogs using a variety of narrative devices. Know a 8 year old who writes the most amazing stuff in his blog….cracks me up everytime I go through it.

All of us are on the social networking sites, posting a lot of stuff, shouting loudly about a lot of things, signing up for causes we dont even know about. Exploring and putting up a lot of personal stuff because the option is there. Compulsively exploring as many of the nifty commands as possible.

I still keep reminding myself that am part of a generation that started learning to use computers. Not the pioneers or the engineers etc who started in the 70s or the 80s. Nor the generation which came next where playing with a computer or a mobile phone was the equivalent of me playing with a squeaky toy. But full blown usage at home when i was around 15. Learning the tedious MS DOS commands and marveling at people who could pull up the same stuff you did in 7 lesser characters. Was lucky that I had a computer at home, wasn’t really a common thing back then.

From there to full blown Graphic users interfaces in the mid 90s to the then wondrous Windows 95 (no had never even seen a MAC until then). Then to post graduation where we got to work in a “computer lab”. Where a bunch of 110 people fought for 15 computers. Bizarre I know. Many of the people with me hadn’t worked on a computer before then and had to go through an introduction course.

Then onto work where again luckily I worked in a place where everyone had a desktop, this wasn’t really common practice 8 years back. In my internship a year before that I saw the bizarre dance of having to type out an email and give it to a receptionist who had access to the prized password and she would send it out. We of course received print outs of the emails we received.

And so on and on and on….until now where I stare into the screen of my laptop almost 14 hours a day. Just makes me wonder whether I am part of the (un) lucky generation that grew up with the gradual increase in the usage of this machine.

I am one of the billions of normal people who use the computer as part of a routine, nothing in terms of cutting edge usage or anything of that sort. In my younger days I would know enough to keep it running, or start it up if something went wrong. But these days if something goes wrong with this machine, then apart from doing what every self respecting sys admin would do, i.e restart it, cant do much more.

And how does this tie in with my opening sentence?

Well was just wondering that where would this go on until.

So now we use the net to publish our thoughts and like I said there are a lot of talented people I know who are doing this beautifully. For the real savvy ones amongst us, to work within a boundary in their social networking sites or blogs etc is second nature. Like I said earlier it just leaves me bewildered. One of the fall outs is that potential employees, girl friends, boy friends, business associates, random people have unfettered access to murky pasts. Think this is already part of a wider debate or will be soon.

All the above has been explore by much smarter people and there are lot of literature available on the same.

The more interesting part is this…..where would this all end up with as far as the next generation is concerned? I think it could have potentially hilarious fall outs.

“DAD you did what during the summer of ’04. And you are telling me not to do this? Where is the justice? What am doing is not even 6.8% as potentially lethal. I have gone thro all the images, all 4539 blurred ones. What do you mean, that was a different time?”

“What the hell have you been writing about me since I was a child, and those images? And how come you never took my permission to put my images?”

“You know am never going to go thro all that you have been writing to me over the last 20 years…video blogging would have been so much easier!!!!”

“What bands have you been writing about anyways? And why are you forcing me to read about them? Give it up the Beatles are like so 100 years back.”


I never wanted to know what my dad did in his college years or what my mom and dad did on vacation! Perhaps thats a personal choice and avenues for learning about the same was offered by the parents and it was your choice to take it or run. But what if it was all around? In a hyper networked world where all and sundry details of what happened 40 years back was there at the click of a button. Oh i know about the checks and blocking and all that stuff, but what if it was just a dunderhead like me doing the rudimentary things and not knowing or not caring enought to put more checks?


And so on…..contemplating how this generations blundering about on the net will be looked at by the next one to come. People in our personal realm of contact.

Should be interesting.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Character Actors

Tell me if am wrong but i would think that we are living in the golden age of character actors as far as Hollywood is concerned. Not that there weren't great ones through all eras of film making. But that they are getting some of their due in terms of starring roles...the recent resurgence of great content on TV also might have added something to it.

Over the next few weeks hope to add to this thread of thought not in terms of character sketches and bios but in terms of favourite moments. We all know the big breakthrough hollywood movements right from Jack Nicholson "Here's Johnny" or Clint Eastwood "Do you feel lucky punk". Am trying to look for some not so conventional moments from some not so conventional actors. Heres one for starters......

Alan Cumming in X2 as Night Crawler. When he's asked who he is. A slight straightening of the back, head tilted upwards "My name is Kurt Wagner, but in the Munich Circus... " and is rudely cut off.........this happens more than a few times in the movies and everytime you can see the hopeful gleam in his eye that he will finally establish his street cred with the rest of mutants....but always gets cut off and you can see the same slightly hurt/bewildered expression on his face every time....small moment carried off beautifully among the over the top performances all around....

Sunday, February 1, 2009

AXL Rose – Chinese Democracy

(my comp crashed 3 times while writing this...how appropriate)

I won't be told anymore That I've been brought down in this storm And left so far out from the shore
That I can't find my way back My way anymore


In terms of mind boggling statistics there has been enough written about Guns N Roses, Chinese Democracy. 14 years, 15 studios give and take a few years. Am not even going into the fact whether it was worth it. For that matter can anything in the pop culture be worth that much? How does one put a tag or a rating on a work which has obviously consumed not just time but the artist himself.

No, I won't be told anymore That I've been brought down in this storm And left so far out from the shore
That I can't find my way back My way anymore No I...I
Forgive them that tear down my soul
And bless them that they might grow old
And free them so that they may know That it's never too late


What would it take for this man to just give up and get the damn thing out? To move on? How many changes of his team, studios, labels, hairstyles would it take to just say fuck it am done? What bullheadedness was needed to ignore the kind of changes which have taken in the music scene, whole sub genres of music have risen and fallen in that time. What was the quest for perfection or imperfection that he was looking for? What mythical Holy Grail drove him?

Oh the many times What seem like a memory I've searched and found the ways you use to lure me in
I've found the ways, oh why it had to be Mired in denial, and so afraid
If we ever find it true That we had the strength to choose I'm free of all these chains We held together


There were certainly enough of us out there who kept track of this. Actually that’s a lie, most of us remembered G ‘N’ R as this guy in a red bandana and white shorts running amok on stage while a guy with wild hair, a top hat and a dangling cigarette seemed to absorb the madness and channel it though one wailing note after another. We were certainly not prepared for the revolving door of musicians both known and obscure (the number of people who have been credited on the album might need its own website).

Until the day when the name of the album itself started to become mythical, a mirage, a derisive term even. Making its way up the list of works awaited for the longest time, shoving aside pretenders. Seemed the second coming of Elvis would happen sooner.

Would it even stand up to scrutiny…end up as a joke when it finally appeared on the shelves? Can anything live up to this kind of promise, waiting?

I won't be told anymore That I've been brought down in this storm And left so far out from the shore
That I can't find my way back My way anymore


Am not even getting into the merits/demerits of the album (for the record I am obsessed). He certainly still has the voice, the wail, the guttural intensity. Rolling Stone magazine remarked that AXL needed a wall of guitars for what Slash and Izzy would conjure up. The songs are likeable enough, wavering between the brilliant and the pedestrian as any “good” album would. But this certainly isn’t an ordinary album is it?

No, I won't be told anymore That I've been brought down in this storm And left so far out from the shore
That I can't find my way back My way anymore

AXL is a true rock star. That makes up for a lot of things. I have wailed enough times that the only super group of my times had split up too way ahead of its time. And the front man who could step into the ranks of the greats in any era (in terms of the attention he generates at least) was busy obsessively turning knobs in an unnamed record studio. He creates interest, obsession, condemnation, anger but never ignored. Oh we had all listened to appetite for destruction with a sense of wonder and worship, marveled at the perfect conflagration of music, promotion and hype that was use your illusion and were all equally bewildered by the spaghetti incident. But where would the Chinese democracy land up in this scale? Was he even worried about the reception?

The answer of course is NO. AXL is one of those once in a generation deviants who leads public opinion, not follow it in the manner of a market researched manufactured product. If he was to crash and burn then so be it.....but crash and burn he would...on his own fucking terms....

Of course the fact that i listened to the damn album obsessively could be that i bought into the wait...bought into the fact that this had to be freaking awesome.....

This song in red...Madagascar, has been performed by G N R over the last few years. With samples from cool hand luke, Martin Luther King Jr and visuals of katrina, starving Africa and Nelson Mandela this would be a outrage against the injustice around, a U2esque paen to those fighting to turn the world.....but I dont think so. Its almost like this is the tracing of the ordeal that was Chinese Democracy.....

No, I won't be told anymore That I've been brought down in this storm And left so far out from the shore That I can't find my way back My way anymore
http://www.gunsnroses.us/chinesedemocracy/madagascar.htm
what do you think?